5 Things A $350 Belt Should Do HUMOR

By now, I’m positive we’ve all heard the story of the Trayon Christian. He’s the nineteen-yr-previous school child who received bagged by the cops after shopping for a Ferragamo belt from Barneys last April for a whopping $350 dollars.

The crime here, in my opinion, is 2 fold.

Salvatore Ferragamo Coat - Clothing - SAL24486 - The RealRealFirst, that for no matter cause, be it race or age, this kid was cuffed and arrested after legally shopping for a belt in a pretty excessive-end retailer where the service of the workers should match the standard of the objects they sell. And anybody ought to be allowed to spend their hard-earned money on no matter they like with out the fear of being harassed or arrested. That’s foul any method you slice it.

The other crime although, must be that this school student saved up from his half time job to spend $350 on a belt. That’s right individuals, a belt. One belt fabricated from leather and steel. And no, the metal wasn’t gold or silver or platinum the leather on the belt was made from plain previous cow, not the one which jumped over the moon. $350 American dollars, earned over lord knows how lengthy from a part time job, and spent it on a singular belt. I’m not gonna get into this kid’s priorities, you spend your cash on what you want /p>

But we at TUD determined that for $350 this belt needs to do a bit greater than hold up pants and obtained our man Pootie Tang—the man with the baddest belt on this planet- to help illustrate.

1) Teleport You Into The Bedroom Of Any And All Video Vixens.

Nyla Lee would want therapy by the time the week is out. That’s just me although.

2) Let you Stroll On Water. For $350, the leather-based must be fabricated from Jesus sandal leather and include a lifetime license to beat dumb asses on sight.

Three) Block Bullets. When cats learn how a lot you paid for it, that will simply be be very necessary Dance Pootie, DANCE!!

Four) Put You In Kanye’s Subsequent Video. Consider the ice-breaker “Hey Kanye, I simply copped a brand new belt… “Yeah, I walk my canine with that one. Wanna be an additional? You won’t even have to speak or sing.

5) Present you unaired episodes of The Wire, Breaking Dangerous and Entourage. – What number of cable bills would $350 cowl? That’s all I’m saying (sure, each of these cats from “The Wire had been in “Pootie Tang .

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